Jsem \u010derstv\u00e1 vdova. U\u017e jen toto samotn\u00e9 slovo je tak odpudiv\u00e9, \u017ee jeho v\u00fdznamov\u00e1 definice vyjad\u0159uje stav, kdy osam\u011ble sed\u00edte doma a m\u00e1te pocit, \u017ee v\u00e1m n\u011bkdo amputoval kon\u010detinu. Bohu\u017eel tento stav v\u011bt\u0161inou p\u0159ich\u00e1z\u00ed bez varov\u00e1n\u00ed, ale o to s v\u00edce surovou realitou, neb \u017eivot se s nik\u00fdm v\u011bt\u0161inou nesere. Jsem vdova bez ohledu, \u017ee by se mi tento status l\u00edbil a nebo jsem si ho p\u0159\u00e1la. \u017divot si to tak napl\u00e1noval, ani\u017e by se mne na to zeptal, nebo se poradil, proto\u017ee jinak by mi dal \u0161anci o tom s n\u00edm licitovat, \u010casu bylo dost, jen \u010dlov\u011bk si myslel, \u017ee se mu nedost\u00e1v\u00e1. Sv\u011bt se mi zastavil a te\u010f mi d\u011bl\u00e1 ve vzduchopr\u00e1zdnu salta a \u010dek\u00e1 co ud\u011bl\u00e1m. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
To nejmen\u0161\u00ed co vdovu \u010dek\u00e1 je zm\u011bna v ob\u010dance. Oto\u010d\u00edte-li si tuto plastovou karti\u010dku , slovo vdan\u00e1, jen\u017e v\u00e1m dote\u010f d\u00e1valo pocit jistoty, z\u00e1zem\u00ed a rodiny, se jedn\u00edm lusknut\u00edm zm\u011bn\u00ed, z dlouh\u00e9ho „\u00e1“ na kr\u00e1tk\u00e9 „a“ , a p\u0159esto\u017ee maj\u00ed ob\u011b slova stejn\u00fd po\u010det p\u00edsmenek, jejich v\u00fdznam se diametr\u00e1ln\u011b li\u0161\u00ed. Nejen\u017ee na v\u00e1s syst\u00e9m ji\u017e nekouk\u00e1 jako na n\u011bkoho, koho m\u016f\u017ee na dan\u00edch odrbat, ale st\u00e1v\u00e1te se \u010dist\u00fdm p\u0159\u00edjemcem d\u00e1vek s nezbytnost\u00ed si vyst\u00e1t \u010dty\u0159 hodinovou frontu, ve snaze z\u00edskat vdovsk\u00fd d\u016fchod. Ale to nejd\u016fle\u017eit\u011bj\u0161\u00ed – zm\u011bn\u00ed se cel\u00fd \u017eivot. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
V\u017edy jsem si myslela, \u017ee slovo vdova vystihuje sta\u0159enku, kter\u00e9 um\u0159el d\u011bde\u010dek a kter\u00e1 nyn\u00ed nostalgicky opra\u0161uje jeho fotku a hrne\u010dek od k\u00e1vy, a tak n\u011bjak s l\u00e1skou v srdci do\u017eije sv\u016fj vym\u011b\u0159en\u00fd \u010das. J\u00e1 jsem v\u0161ak potetovan\u00e1 vdova, miluj\u00edc\u00ed punk, rock a kdy\u017e u\u017e na to p\u0159ijde i ten folk, z\u00e1le\u017e\u00ed na n\u00e1lad\u011b, kter\u00e1 za\u010dala opra\u0161ovat fotku a hrne\u010dek….sakra n\u011bco je se mnou \u0161patn\u011b. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
S man\u017eelem ka\u017ed\u00e9 r\u00e1no mluv\u00edm, p\u0159i\u010dem\u017e je ka\u017ed\u00e9 probuzen\u00ed jin\u00e9. Vstanu a p\u0159esto\u017ee jej st\u00e1le sly\u0161\u00edm chr\u00e1pat v\u00edm , \u017ee nejsem bl\u00e1zen, jen mi mozek d\u011bl\u00e1 harakiri v hlav\u011b. P\u0159ipom\u00edn\u00e1 mi to film Slunce, seno, jahody a zp\u00edvaj\u00edc\u00ed ikonick\u00e1 postava Hubi\u010dkov\u00e1 v pod\u00e1n\u00ed Ji\u0159iny Jir\u00e1skov\u00e9 p\u00e1 pa p\u00e1 pa papapa p\u00e1, nebo\u0165 kdy\u017e vylezu z pelechu v relativn\u011b v dobr\u00e9m stavu , tak m\u00e1m tendenci man\u017eelovi pou\u0161t\u011bt jeho obl\u00edbenou Candy Dulfer. Kdy\u017e v\u0161ak vylezu levou zadn\u00ed, tak Michala Davida , kter\u00e9ho nesn\u00e1\u0161el, neb um\u00edm b\u00fdt i krutop\u0159\u00edsn\u00e1. On se mne taky neptal, zda budu souhlasit s t\u00edm, \u017ee se zabije a mne tu nech\u00e1 napospas. Te\u010f mi chyb\u00ed a nejen mne. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Du\u0161evn\u00ed nemoc je n\u011bco, co si lid\u00e9 nedok\u00e1\u017e\u00ed p\u0159edstavit, pokud to osobn\u011b neza\u017eij\u00ed . Ani j\u00e1 dote\u010f nech\u00e1pu o \u010dem to je. J\u00e1 extrovert, on introvert, j\u00e1 pozitivn\u00ed pohled na sv\u011bt – slunce sv\u00edt\u00ed, sklenice je polopln\u00e1, kdyby polopr\u00e1zdn\u00e1 sta\u010d\u00ed jen dol\u00edt a jede se d\u00e1l. \u017de to m\u016f\u017ee m\u00edt n\u011bkdo tak t\u011b\u017ek\u00e9, \u017ee ho to do\u017eene a\u017e k sebevra\u017ed\u011b, mne za boha nenapadlo. O to v\u00edce mne to mrz\u00ed, p\u0159i\u010dem\u017e slovo „mrz\u00ed“ zcela nevystihuje hloubku m\u00fdch pocit\u016f, \u017ee jsem se neum\u011bla pod\u00edvat na sv\u011bt jeho o\u010dima . Mo\u017en\u00e1, \u017ee kdyby ka\u017ed\u00fd z n\u00e1s m\u011bl mo\u017enost si jednou obl\u00e9ci kab\u00e1t druh\u00e9ho \u010dlov\u011bka, bylo by mezi lidmi v\u00edce l\u00e1sky, porozum\u011bn\u00ed, pochopen\u00ed a vz\u00e1jemn\u00e9 tolerance. M\u00e1 neschopnost vc\u00edt\u011bn\u00ed se, te\u010f „nese sv\u00e9 ovoce“ . U\u017e nem\u00e1m s k\u00fdm se dohadovat, roz\u010dilovat se, \u017ee nejsou pono\u017eky v ko\u0161i na pr\u00e1dlo a ani nem\u00e1m s k\u00fdm v\u00e9st dlouh\u00e9 a nezapomenuteln\u00e9 politick\u00e9 diskuze dlouho do noci. Najednou je ticho. Sv\u011bt se po 27 letech zastavil a j\u00e1 stoj\u00edm s n\u00edm. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Proto va\u017eme si bl\u00edzk\u00fdch lid\u00ed, proto\u017ee pokud byl dnes norm\u00e1ln\u00ed den, z\u00edtra ji\u017e nemus\u00ed b\u00fdt. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Jsem \u010derstv\u00e1 vdova. U\u017e jen toto samotn\u00e9 slovo je tak odpudiv\u00e9, \u017ee jeho v\u00fdznamov\u00e1 definice vyjad\u0159uje stav, kdy osam\u011ble sed\u00edte doma a m\u00e1te pocit, \u017ee v\u00e1m n\u011bkdo amputoval kon\u010detinu. Bohu\u017eel tento stav v\u011bt\u0161inou p\u0159ich\u00e1z\u00ed bez varov\u00e1n\u00ed, ale o to s v\u00edce surovou realitou, neb \u017eivot se s nik\u00fdm v\u011bt\u0161inou nesere. Jsem vdova bez ohledu, \u017ee […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-31","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/certovavdova.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/certovavdova.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/certovavdova.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/certovavdova.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/certovavdova.cz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=31"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/certovavdova.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":32,"href":"https:\/\/certovavdova.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31\/revisions\/32"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/certovavdova.cz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=31"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/certovavdova.cz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=31"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/certovavdova.cz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=31"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}